photo444

We are Doomed

Mon, 10 Sep 2012 14:54:00 -0700

Today I was just asked, by a co worker

Him: “Hey what type of fuel mileage you get in that big ass truck?”

Me: I was just asked that yesterday, 14 city / 17 freeway / 24 open hwy.

Him: “Well then I guess that is because your electrical system is pretty clean huh? But then agian you know about IT type things and all”

Me: What the hell are you talking about?

Him: “Hmmph! well then I guess you don’t know as much as you let on about.

Me: Seriously, before you annoy me any further, what the hell are you talking about?

Him: I saw on the news…

(before proceeding, 2 weeks ago I had a conversation with a “true tech guy” friend of mine who said anytime someone asks him a IT question beginning with the statement “I saw it on the news” he cringes, waiting for the stupidity)

Him: I saw on the news, a news report that said a good clean electrical system in your car raises your MPG. So I figured you might already be doing it, since you drive a truck.

Me: I really don’t know anything about cars, other than I once had a car that in order to get it to the mechanics I had pop-start it, in order to get it there and have my alternator and the battery replaced.
So, I am fairly confident in my knowledge that those two systems are independent of each other in a “fuel” engine.

Him: That’s where your wrong! The cleaner the electrical system, the easier electricity travels through your car, thus the less fuel you burn as a result of your engine having to do less work! I bought a Fuel Doctor and have increased MPG by 15%

Me: Your an idiot! So do you also turn off your BlueTooth and Navigation to save fuel as well?

Him: Why do you always have to be such an ass.

Me: You never seem to get any smarter?

Go Look it up HERE, the only thing stupider than the product is the comments/reviews of the disappointed people. My favorite is the Electrical Engineer who thought he would give it a try.

Follow Up — About an hour later I passed him and showed off a paper clip that I fastened to the back of my iPhone with tape.

Him: What’s that for?

Me: Same guy that invented the Fuel Doctor tried to get a patent on this but Apple went after him with an injunction.

Him: Apple! They truly are bastards, I keep reading about stuff like that. So what’s it do?

Me: Increases cell range and increases Wi-Fi range.

Him: Sweet! Good to know! (as he walks away)

So start checking the tech idiots around you, should any of them begin sporting a paperclip and tape antenna, you can claim that you knew me before I invented it.

Room 102 For nearly 20 years or at least as long as I can...

Sat, 19 May 2012 18:33:02 -0700

Room 102
For nearly 20 years or at least as long as I can remember whenever Christi and I are in or near Joshua Tree CA we have always stayed at the same ancient motor-court motel. Only in the last 5 years or so did they finally replace the old bright orange shag carpeting that was most likely installed somewhere around the time of our births, to something more modern. But never the less, this motel has been the start or finish to 100’s of our adventures.
An Indian family that became the proprietors about 8 years ago and always know Christi by name as soon as she says hello on the telephone. Also in the past 20 something years we have always stayed in either room 104 or 105 with no exceptions. Habit? Who knows perhaps for the same reason I also park in front of a tree or lamppost when parking in a large lot, it minimizes my search when I lose my car (I can navigate my way by compass, stars and or a map anywhere/terrain in the world, but introduce concrete and I am a basket case. At 46 I think that a mall has been exited by same door I entered only once in my life) or maybe it is because 104 & 105 both do not have adjoining doors?
This morning upon arriving in Joshua Tree we learned that a music festival is going on, so this town and the surrounding areas are booked to capacity. The elderly Indian lady at the desk (Christi calls grandma) was apologetic and said “we have but one room and it is 102, also it has an adjoining door?” Christi told her that would be alright and that she understood, after thanking her, grandma then added “not to worry it is only the Doctor”.
When we offloaded our overnight bags before heading into the desert, I asked Christi “she just said the Doctor?” Yes she said, but she also added that the Doctor was a very nice man.
So as I am pondering the adjoining door, one can not help but to wonder, will we meet the Doctor, will his Sonic Screwdriver defeat the deadbolt, will Christi and I be the next of the Doctor’s companions to travel through time in the Tardis?
One can only hope ;-)

A day in the desert off the grid — Pinnacles area Lake...

Sun, 06 May 2012 09:22:21 -0700

A day in the desert off the grid — Pinnacles area Lake Arrowhead California

Libraries are Autonomous Two Saturday’s ago our truck was...

Mon, 30 Apr 2012 23:14:00 -0700

Libraries are Autonomous

Two Saturday’s ago our truck was broken into while we were dining after hiking in Lake Arrowhead. Yes I stupidly left my wallet in my pack. But Christi and I are as well protected as anyone in the electronic age can be, basically we walked out saw glass, she called LifeLock and I called Wells Fargo… Now 8 days on this evening I just activated my replacement debit card.
BUT!
Before that happened I went to my public library and here is what transpired.

Me: hi, I had a book stolen as well as my library card and I would like to replace both.

Library Lady or LL: ok I will need at least 2 forms of picture ID

Me: I have this passport and this date-due receipt from you with my library card number.

LL: types in my number and says that book is overdue and you owe a fine.

Me: correct AND gone, as in stolen.

LL: you will have pay for that.

Me: yes, again stolen book and library card, really only two things on my agenda here.

LL: did you claim it on the police report?

Me: actually yes, but only as ”book”, I failed to give you or the author credit, why?

LL: if it is on the report I don’t have to charge you a $5 servicing fee.

Me: cool
— she then proceeds to ring it up, I pay her

Me: would like the report number?

LL: of?

Me: you said if ”I reported it, the fee would be waived”

LL: it was.

Me: but what good did it do you or the library, are you just going type in stolen and match it with any random report?

LL: no sir, anything else I can do today?

Me: new library card…

LL: can I see two forms of picture id?

Me: I have THIS passport and THAT scrap of paper with my info on it.

LL: sir your card was stolen so I require 2 forms of id.

Me: all I have is this one form of id, this passport.

LL: we require two.

Me: did you not just charge me for the book?

LL: yes sir right there is your receipt, she says pointing to it.

Me: yes and will I be paying again once I get the new card?

LL: no sir, it is already in your file.

Me: OK good, then follow me, so from this piece of paper and this number on it you can apply the charges to the correct account which is fantastic, now this document is issued by the USA and allows me access to other countries AND has my picture on it.

LL: I know what a passport does sir, but what it doesn’t do is tell me where you live.

Me: (producing a State Farm letter) but this does.

LL: sir two forms that’s the rule.

Me: I only showed you my drivers license originally when we moved here!

LL: but now your card has been stolen, so we require two forms.

Me: ok then, I dropped it in a lawn mower, may I get another.

LL: you already said it was stolen, so no.

Me: I have passport, your records, a letter MATCHING the same address you have on file, a receipt now that says you accepted the fact I can pay for me and your refusing to look at the photo of me in this form of id albeit only a single form.

LL: passports are not recognized forms of id.

Me: since when did libraries become autonomous.

LL: you need to understand this was a theft.

Me: NOT by me, but AGAINST me, I have committed no crime against the autonomous book kingdom.

LL: meaning what sir?

Me: is there someone that outranks you? Or rather someone that does not think I am going to use my non-recognized USA passport in an elaborate scheme to upset the power of the book kingdom by moving books across international lines 10 books at a time or whatever the hell the limit is!

LL: sir I am the supervisor here.

Me: honestly? Dear lord because your a fucking idiot, this is a library paid by our taxes not the DMV. Until this day I have always been a proponent of lending libraries, now I hope that electronic publishing puts an end your autonomous power trip very soon!

— at this point I realized I am the only one speaking in the library. Nope I did not get a library card, probably even had my file red flagged at the book kingdom HQ today.

Well tomorrow I have an appointment with the ”actual” DMV, we will see what adventures that brings. And should they say I need a library card? Chances are I will stab someone with a pen.

I had a meeting with a new public relations client in Orange...

Wed, 29 Feb 2012 19:06:00 -0800

I had a meeting with a new public relations client in Orange County, arriving early to a very nice building, one of those typical to Orange County shared office high rises.
Marble entryway, dual elevator banks capped off by a water fountain at the far end of the hall, backed by a glass wall looking on to a manicured palm tree garden. I quickly found my contacts name on the brass mounted office map and took a ride up to the 9th floor. The elevator deposits me not into a hallway but into the center of a large office, apparently the whole floor is this one firm I think and it quickly plays out that indeed it is. Approaching the only person evident, a very strikingly beautiful blond. Her appearance is that of model at 6 foot tall, a size 4 dress, sitting at a glass desk with no drawers just a glass surface and chrome legs upon which are only two items matching iPads and a Bluetooth headset which she was wearing in addition to her gown. I cant really call it anything else but a gown, either that or some very glamorous office attire? Red silk, slit to her thigh and cleavage showing to her mid torso and simple straps exposing very toned arms.
At this point you are probably thinking this sounds like Jim is writing a Penthouse letter?
While what was actually running through my head was,
A) I am not here to photograph a model.
B) It is not type of agency nor that type of product.
C) It is not even suppose to be a modeling agency so this has to be the wrong place!
Hello I am here to see ___ I said. Oh hello you must be Jim, he will meet with you shortly, please have a seat as she waved me to one of the only two chairs in reception. Someone had to have this thought out well, the chairs directly faced her desk and besides a few tasteful paintings hanging behind me on the wall everything was smoked glass and chrome and devoid of real color. While she in position that was spot lit and was the only thing of color in the room, again I though it is NOT that type of agency.
That is when I noticed the music that was playing from the overhead speakers “68 Guns by the Alarm” wow it had been years since I heard that song, well just recently I had heard my beloved Clash in a Trader Joe’s, so perhaps the Alarm is muzak now as well?
The next song takes me moment longer to recognize because it is so very out of place and context here “If the Kids are United by Sham 69” the last time I heard this song I was still sporting a Mohawk and did own not a single shirt that still retained it’s sleeves. This can not be muzak! I look up at the receptionist and she does not seem phased by the musical selection at all. Next up on the playlist was “Run Runaway by Slade” OK, so now it is getting just a tad weird.
I think back to the name of my contacts name who is also the owner of the agency while thinking his name is all wrong for this music. Wrong ethnicity, wrong context, these are the songs from my high school years, these are the songs that landed somewhere between my Punk rock and the Heavy Metal of my friends or girlfriends this is the in between music that could be agreed upon at parties to be played. These are the music of my demographic and youth, this guy should also be white, mid 40’s, fond of the so called “Oi Bands” NOT the guy I spoke to on the phone with a definable a Indian accent and name. Also not the receptionist’s who most likely younger than the invention of CD’s. While I am pondering this, my contact appears. Late 50’s, dressed as my mind pictured. Black loafers worn with tan socks, khaki slacks, a tucked in white short sleeve dress shirt and an out of date tie, gold watch and 3 pens in his shirt pocket. I am not stereotyping, but what the hell this guy did not look like he belonged in his own office or the owner of “Oi band” music! Instead he looked if he should be Dwight Schrute’s best friend from the TV show “the Office”
While we shook hands and he began leading me into the conference room the next selection in their odd soundtrack came on, and this one I recognize by the very first beat “TNT by AC/DC” a song that has punctuated a lot things and times in my life.

I turn back towards my contact and say to him seriously what is up with your music?
“Do you like it my friend?”
Yes I do, this was the music of teenage years.
“Well my friend I will tell you then” as he raises a single finger pointing the speaker “$1, just $1 is what I paid for this box of cassettes, my wife she makes go to the garage sales and good things can sometimes be found, yes?”
I stand there just staring at him, then I glance at the receptionist and for the first time since she told me to have a seat she acknowledges my presence by shaking her head yes and rolling her eyes.

In the conference room there was no music and while we spoke, I kept thinking about the last four songs knowing that I had just been time traveling through some teenagers “Cassette” Mix Tape that I could have easily made myself somewhere between 80 - 84.

While typing this I am suddenly remembering and I am wondering should I have had waited around long enough maybe, just maybe the “Oi Band” anthem would have played?

1 of 8 Lunar New Years parade @ Chinatown Los Angeles

Sun, 29 Jan 2012 14:33:34 -0800

1 of 8
Lunar New Years parade @ Chinatown Los Angeles

2 of 8 Lunar New Years parade @ Chinatown Los Angeles

Sun, 29 Jan 2012 14:32:50 -0800

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Lunar New Years parade @ Chinatown Los Angeles

3 of 8 Lunar New Years parade @ Chinatown Los Angeles

Sun, 29 Jan 2012 14:32:21 -0800

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Lunar New Years parade @ Chinatown Los Angeles

4 of 8 Lunar New Years parade @ Chinatown Los Angeles

Sun, 29 Jan 2012 14:31:52 -0800

4 of 8
Lunar New Years parade @ Chinatown Los Angeles

5 of 8 Lunar New Years parade @ Chinatown Los Angeles

Sun, 29 Jan 2012 14:31:20 -0800

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Lunar New Years parade @ Chinatown Los Angeles

6 of 8 Lunar New Years parade @ Chinatown Los Angeles

Sun, 29 Jan 2012 14:30:15 -0800

6 of 8
Lunar New Years parade @ Chinatown Los Angeles

7 of 8 Lunar New Years parade @ Chinatown Los Angeles

Sun, 29 Jan 2012 14:29:45 -0800

7 of 8
Lunar New Years parade @ Chinatown Los Angeles

8 of 8 Lunar New Years parade @ Chinatown Los Angeles

Sun, 29 Jan 2012 14:29:16 -0800

8 of 8
Lunar New Years parade @ Chinatown Los Angeles

Everyone I know seem to know right now is riding a bike or...

Tue, 23 Aug 2011 00:01:00 -0700

Everyone I know seem to know right now is riding a bike or asking me to go on a ride with them lately.

So every night I pull into the garage first thing I see is my road bike, mountain bike and my latest edition a urban/city bike, all of them whimpering and begging to go for a run.
Christi and I have taken the city bikes out a few times of late, but it is a little hard fetched to call them rides when you wear flip flops while journeying to eat a burger then see a movie before tackling the grueling 1.7 miles back home :).
Today a friend of mine at work asked me if I was interested in riding a century with him, which is scheduled sometime in the next 30 days, Newport to San Diego and then he added “BUT we ride Amtrak back home and they transport our bike to the train station”.
I told him it has been at least 10 years since I rode a 100 miles, hell I am not even sure that I have ridden over 50 miles in a row in the last 5 years?

But I do remember the first time I rode a century, we were living in Sacramento, the Tour de France was on TV, the commentators keep speaking on the topic of training rides and century rides. I said to Christi “how hard can that be it’s on a bicycle? I have traveled those distances in deserts & mountain with full packs on foot in continuous motion!” So I set forth on my trusty 35 pound steel Rock Hopper mountain bike by Specialized with it’s stock seat, 2.5 inch knobby tires in a pair of cut off military fatigue pants, a cotton t-shirt, New Balance running shoes and NO clue, to begin riding to Chico CA up HWY 99 in July in my normal fashion of “Do first, learn or die later” Along about the halfway point or Yuba City I stopped at a Dairy Queen for some food, water and try to figure out why everything “felt squishy down there”. I told the kid at the Diary Queen that my bike was his responsibility (secretly hoping a missing bike would end this) and headed for the bath room where I dropped my shorts and discovered there was not much of my skin that had not blistered several times over, crap! I was not going to call it quits and call Christi, so I did the next best thing I fixed myself with Duct Tape, ate 3 burgers, then set off again.
Finally after 7.2 hours I arrived in Chico to another burger place where Christi and her best friend where waiting, Christi and Sommer both said “so how was it?” It was hard, it sucked and I doubt I will do that again! About a week later or when all the duct tape glue had finally worn off me and I could look at my bike without cringing. I read an article in the paper about riding your first century which claimed you should expect it to take 8-10 hours and take a 10 minute break each hour. I thought “hey I did that in 7.2 hours, it was actually 112 miles and except for the Dairy Queen stop I had taken no breaks.

Where we lived in Sacramento it was on the American river across the bridge from Old Town, from there to Folsom lake is a fantastic bike trail covering 30 something miles from Old Town to Folsom Lake.
Shortly after my century I was playing on trail chasing “true cyclists” (still clothed wrong but flying on shorter rides). I heard a miniature siren, so I looked behind me to see a little red light on a moped ridden by a uniformed police officer. I pulled over while he pulled in behind me, my first thought was Christi is going to love it if I become a fugitive on a mountain bike! The officer wanted my ID which I was not carrying, he then demanded my immediate dismount where he then knelt down and recorded my bicycles serial number while at the same time informing me that he was going to cite me for speeding. REALLY? Yes he said I clocked you doing 19 mph and the speed limit through here is 12 mph. That is cool I said. Cool? he said you will also be required to sign this ticket and present it with your ID when you pay the fine so as we can verify the proper information on your ID.
At this point I was laughing, literally I could have picked up my bike, taken 3 steps up the embankment and been out of his UN-armed moped riding cop’s reach. Son this is no laughing matter he said, yes it is Sir and no problem I will gladly sign your ticket and then frame it as proof that I received a speed violation on my bicycle. Somewhere I still have my have my proudly earned, yet still unpaid ticket. I just hope the owner of that Rock Hopper wherever it is these days is not doing hard time for my flagrant disregard of moped riding lawmen.
But that day changed my thought of bicycles, until rudely interrupted by a moped I had kept up with the “lycra wearers” as I once called them, so Christi and I journeyed to a “real” cycle shop. After recounting my first century mainly to disbelief. They showed me a whole new world of shoes, shorts that did the job of my “duct tape remedy” before it gets to that point, proper saddles and tires that were smooth having a much smaller contact point and OH! what a difference they made to my Heavy Steel Steed in regards to vibration and speed! Before eventually upgrading to Road Bikes I would ride those trails recording 5234 miles according to my new cycle computer (so I knew whenever my speeds reached moped posse status) also in that mix of mileage was at least 4 more centuries as well.
Today 15 years and 24,000+ miles later, I left work thinking “hmm, could I even ride 100 miles today?” Having not done any serious riding in about 4 years. So after pumping up the tires on my road bike and setting out to locate my gear. I realized that it all had been untouched since our move to Irvine followed by the thought “why did I not pack it all in the same duffel bag?” Finally finished locating shoes, shorts, gloves and the rest of the gear, I went back and checked the tires, yep still holding at 110 psi and headed out. Except for missing the left clip at my first encountered stop sign and feeling like a complete amateur, my wonderful 10 year old Allez performed great.
Fairly sure now that I am little bit wiser, it will require a few more rides before I set off on another century anytime soon (although when Christi reads this she will probably laugh and say “right Jimmy, like next week?”
Even tough today’s ride is a long way from pro status, 15.7 miles round trip from our house to the Newport Back Bay at a 18.1 mph average was a pretty good shakedown ride for a bike and rider that have not been together in over a year at least…

It is official Cat Woman hates me! I never even suspected it...

Sun, 03 Jul 2011 20:30:00 -0700

It is official Cat Woman hates me!

I never even suspected it but yet today it was confirmed. Not being a comic book fan myself, I have no idea who her allies are, or rather which other comic book figures I should also expect to hold me in such high disdain?

Christi and I looking for something to do today that did not involve kayaking with the 9 trillion people that have headed to the ocean this holiday weekend, decided to head into L.A. where we generally park at Union Station and take the subways & trains throughout the city and get off at random stops and go exploring. Today we chose Hollywood for a bit because Christi likes to check the vintage clothing stores. I took a camera because where there are people there is “sometimes” great street photography. My general experience with street photography is it can be great if the place does not get in the way such places as Amusement Parks or Hollywood where every single photo says “hey this is that place” in those cases the people get in the way of the place.

Walking the better part of Hollywood Blvd. not really seeing anything to point a camera at until we were in front of Grauman’s Chinese Theatre, here there was a sea of people putting their feet and hands into the concrete impressions made by famous actors. Along with the tourists there were a hoard of people dressed poorly as Pirates, Stormtroopers, Iron Man, Superman, Spiderman, characters that I did not recognize AND of course Cat Woman. Here was a place the people and the place would work, so I switched to a wide angle lens and purposely shot from the hip looking up. I wanted the people, characters and building from a angle looking up to the theater.

Suddenly Cat Woman grabs my camera bag and demanding;

CW: Who do work for?
me: Why?
CW: You can’t take pictures!
me: What the hell are you talking about, that’s all people are people are doing.
CW: WHO DO YOU WORK FOR!
me: Myself, Jim McGill Photography
CW: You can’t take photos.
me: Yes I can.
CW: No you can, not you did not ask!
me: You mean I did not give you the $10 that everyone is paying to stand next to you goofballs?
CW: YOU NEED TO ASK! I am reporting you.
me: To whom? This is a public place and your in costume, what did you think was going to happen today when you got dressed up?
(at this point I hear Christi laughing behind me and hear sound of her iPhone snapping away)
Cat Woman then pulls out her own camera and pretends to take my photo, how do you like it?
me: You need to push that button on top to make it work, did you know that?
CW: It is HD video, I don’t need to push any buttons!
She then flips the live view screen out to show me, apparently she does not know what the flashing red words that say “NO CF CARD” actually mean?
Cat Woman then and pretends to take a another photo of the photo444.com logo on my lens hood, vowing to report me to the high authorities (would that be the justice league?) along with looking me up to make sure I do not use her image…

So in honor of the crazy woman that dresses up while expecting people NOT to photograph her, apparently thus giving away her true identity?
I hope you found your way here and come to understand that there is no expectation of privacy in a public place, not my idea, for that one you will have to take it up with the supreme court, sorry and honestly being from Hollywood have you never seen the TV show TMZ just for starters?

PS If you look closely this is a self portrait of which you inadvertently got in the way of and I just filled out a model release for myself and filed it with my higher authorities ;-)

Border Crossing Fun

Fri, 03 Jun 2011 17:19:00 -0700

Under normal circumstances I could drive into Mexico with a semi truck emblazoned with the words “Illegal Stuff” and have a donkey standing on my hood and I would simply get the green light and proceed on my trip.

But because I am on my way to meet Aaron Foor in Ensenada there has to be a glitch (every single time, even once being kicked out of Mexico back into the USA at the border, but that is another story)

As I am in the line up to enter Mexico, I notice the car to my right has a full on aluminum dog sled lashed to their roof. As I ponder, what will they do with it in Baja? How will they explain it if they are questioned? Where are their dogs?

It is my car that gets the red light signal for secondary inspection, just as the dog sled laden car gets a green light!

Two soldiers ask me to step out of my car and begin to question me.

Guard: What is your reason for crossing the border?

Me: To get to Mexico

Guard: How did you get here?

Me: That car (pointing at my car)

Guard: What will you buy?

Me: Buy?

Guard: Yes what will you buy?

Me: Do you have a gift shop?

Guard: What?

At this point solider #2 is frustrated I will not even attempt Spanish with him and fetches a third person, who has better English

New Guard: What will you attempt to buy?

Me: Why is that even a question?

New Guard: Open your trunk

As they open my camera bag up

New Guard: Why do you have a camera

Me: I am a photographer

New Guard: You have 2 cameras here! Do plan to sell them in Mexico?

Me: I just told you, I am a photographer.

They pause and stare at me, where will you go?

So I pointed South

New Guard: OK you should go.

Me: After I buy stuff, should I bring you my list?

New Guard: What list?

Me: Of everything that I buy in Mexico

New Guard: Why?

Me: Hey it was your line of questioning and I am just trying to be helpful.

What is in my Bag on Flickr.Apple MacBook Pro Glasses Gerber...

Mon, 23 May 2011 19:15:03 -0700

What is in my Bag on Flickr.

Apple MacBook Pro
Glasses
Gerber Knife
Favorite type of Pen
Felt Pen
Mechanical Pencil
Sharpie
Wallet
Car Keys
Office Key
Explorer Key on Lanyard for Kayaking
iPad
iPhone
Ear Buds
Moleskine for Writing
3x5 Cards for Notes
Trident & Toothpicks
iPhone & iPad Charger
MacBook Charger
Canon Elf SD 600
Lacie Rugged Drive
2 x 2 GB Thumbdrives
Moleskine for General Projects
Moleskine for Photo Assignments
Tenba Messenger Bag
Hidden on top strap Petzl Head Lamp

Since the day Christi and I moved away the mountains we have...

Sat, 09 Apr 2011 13:47:14 -0700

Since the day Christi and I moved away the mountains we have either lived in condos or homes where gardeners were employed at both. Gardening is NOT my forte, love, nor hobby, frankly the only two types of yards that appeal to me are forests or concrete. I will happily rake my my pine needles once a year for fire clearance or hose off a patio. I have used a lawnmower in my life exactly twice and that was in my late 30’s and neither time did I all giddy or consider farming as a possible lifestyle change.
Turns out at our new condo in Irvine, that although the association does employ gardeners, for some bizarre reason the rules state that the last 10 feet of your walkway leading to the door is not gardened by the association gardeners, why? who knows?
So since it is only 10 feet, we are not going to hire gardener to maintain an area of roughly 90 sq feet, most comprised of lava stones at that. Except for some Ivy, so the association neatly trims the first 12 feet of the walkway Ivy and then leaves the last 2.5 feet to encroach upon the sidewalk, climb the wall of the garage and a palm tree.
I set out armed with rose pruning shears, a combat blade and my trusted machete…

Neighbor #1
You know your doing that wrong?
Why?
Your using a machete
Yes I am, sorry my gardening experience is limited to growing up in the mountains and clearing jungles.
You don’t own a power pruner?
Nope
What about a weed whacker?
Nope
Well your doing it wrong, just saying… as he walked off down the street.

Neighbor #2
— Note: once again proving Christi and I are the most dangerous people in Irvine — or what I like to call “the Truman Show” (go watch that movie we live there).
Normally when a man is using a machete, a normal person not living in this town, would not be tempted to walk up behind the guy armed with a machete and stand with his leashed dog 2 feet behind the machete armed person, and then announce his presence —
Hey!
Hey
You know your using a machete?
Yes I am aware of that, I did put into my hand myself.
You know there are children here?
Hiding in my Ivy right now, or behind the palm tree?
No there are not children hiding in your yard.
Then I guess we are good, since you say my walkway is child free?
As he stood there silently looking at my machete which was safely pointed down at my right side and his dog sat there panting.
I asked is there something else you would like to add to this?
He turned and walked away…

My whole gardening adventure took place inside of 20 minutes which including my sweep up and the iPhone shot for this story. Like I said it was only 2.5 feet worth of Ivy.
Today’s lesson; in the future my Irvine micro gardening will only be done as a nighttime guerrilla operation.

Our first time in Kayaks & our lesson are now behind us. The...

Sat, 12 Mar 2011 16:08:29 -0800

Our first time in Kayaks & our lesson are now behind us. The instructor either felt we were taking directions well or we intimidated him? As he seldom corrected us with more than a single word such end stroke at 3 o’clock and the other two in our class he would repeat the same instructions ad nauseam, normally he would be forced to fetch Christi and I back as we would just take off across the bay. Christi did spectacular using all her hip rotations and the controlling of her paddle after she discovered it was the same basic movements as her Karate & Aikido. It felt natural to both of us and now having spent roughly 4 hours in a Kayak I am confident that this will be my mountaineering/adventure replacement sport. Now the voluntary water-boarding or capsizing my Kayak to practice wet exits and entry NOT SO FUN it has been a long damn time since I had that much water poured up my nose! Christi said it is just like a Netti pot, well I don’t believe in using the home water-boarding kits either. Actually with the exception of a bet/race with Justin to dive over the edge of Faith and swim under her to the other side (and there was a lot alcohol involved) the last time I was wet in the ocean at all, I think I was 17 years old. Christi and I were partnered up to assist with each others re-entries at sea, so we now know we can do it! Well on calm sheltered water anyhow, for now… The only time I had a problem was with the beach landing, proper knee/leg exit placement caused me to spill into the water. I will have to work on my technique, sadly if I could do as the instructor was saying “bring your knees up to a 45 and exit on either side of kayak simultaneously thus standing smoothly” hell if my left knee could do that I most likely would not be exploring a new adventure sport. Either way I am hooked ;-)

And so the next expedition begins; Today Christi and I spent 3...

Sun, 27 Feb 2011 18:05:52 -0800

And so the next expedition begins;

Today Christi and I spent 3 hours trying on Kayaks and getting a heck of an education from the owner of Southwind Kayaks. We are pretty much settled on the Vision 150 for her & the Solstice GT for me both made by Current Designs. On the 12th we will take our first lessons and get to water test these Kayaks.

This time next year hopefully the Arctic!